Flat Hunting Part 2
This is agony tonight, I've broken a bone or something in my right hand, the painkillers might start to work soon, but I doubt it. I only type with my right hand. The show must go on, so to speak.....
I fell lucky, very lucky, no doubt about it. The flat is perfect, nice kitchen, big living room, comfy size bedroom, freshly painted throughout, and the view!! my god its stunning. I wander around for ten minutes or so, pretending to think about it. Whats to think about?
Nope its no good, to do this much has taken half an hour, I'm not chickening out or anything I'm just in pain and my mind is not on the subject matter. To paraphrase somebody else "I'll be back"
Money, that's what to think about, I have not got any, no job, nothing, zilch. Damn frustrating, but I have a top class mother, quick phone call and I'm half way to it. I need a deposit and a months rent up front. Angel, yet again steps in, bless her, she really is an angel. Angel will be in my tale quite a lot, I owe her big style as I do quite a few people. So the deposit and a months rent is sorted.
This if i remember rightly was a Wednesday, the tenancy agreement wouldn't be ready until Friday, it seems so far away! The amountt of times I drove to the place just to have a look was silly, half a dozen times on the Thursday, a few times on the Friday morning. Finally Friday afternoon, the agreement signed, guess where I go?
Nope wrong! I head to my mothers for a coffee! Sat in her conservatory drinking coffee just looking at a set of keys. It didn't occur to me I could have gone to my flat, the thought never entered my stupid befuddled mind. At the time I had no idea why. On reflection it was because I had nobody controlling my life, I had been so beaten down by Kathy that I was no longer capable of sane rational independent thinking. We will get back to this soon enough, figuring out the hows and whys of what happened drove me to the brink of suicide.
"Where are you sleeping tonight?" said my mother, instinctively, I replied here, (meaning her place), She just looked at me. Then it dawned on me, I had a place of my own, a roof over my head, a home! No furniture, no bedding, nothing, but I had a place! my pad!
I needed bedding, I had some, but it was at Kathy's, the thought of having to talk to her made me sweat. Grabbing my mobile, I found her number, before dialling a ciggy was in order. Taking a deep drag I pressed the dial button.
It rang once, twice, three times "hello?" a shiver went down my spine, my hair stood on end. I recognised this instantly for what it was, fear! I wasn't pleasant to her, I should have been. "I've got a place to stay" I said "I need some bedding, can I get some?" "yes" came the reply, "thing is Kathy I don't want to be alone in that house with you, can you make sure theres someone else with you?" she replied "I can do that, give me half an hour" I put the phone down.
It was a horrible feeling to return to that house, it was a family home for so long, I tried to remember some of the good things that had happened in it. I failed miserably to think of any. To this day, I can only think of one or two, our wedding day party and getting my cat, Maiden. I knocked on the back door. Her friend answered it (Kathy's friend is not a big part of this, so I'm not going to give her a name). I needn't have stressed so much, Kathy wasn't in the house. A huge sigh of relief swept over me.
The atmosphere in that place was horrible, it felt heavy, very malignant, like the place was full of evil, a type of cancer (for want of a better word). I had to get out of it sharpish, I wanted no more to do with it. Very hard to describe in words really. Grabbing two quilts and a couple of pillows from my old room, I was out of that place quicker than a cork from a champagne bottle, it was like I'd been greased or something!
Literally running to my car, I threw the bedding in the back, jumped in, started her up and planted her one. I had to get away, the fear of god was in me, I couldn't get away quick enough. What the hell was wrong with me? fear I think, possibly of Kathy but more that horrible malignancy. The further away I got the easier it was. I calmed down again. As usual the need for a ciggy took over.
It was time, time to head to my new home, time to begin my new life.
No comments:
Post a Comment